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By Michael Swan
Between the pressure to succeed, the distorting echo of social media, and the lack of solid reference points, many of us, especially young adults, move forward in uncertainty, even if our intentions are good. Our quest for meaning is profound, but it often clashes with a world that speaks more about personal fulfillment than collective well-being, a world that advocates more rather than being.
The idea that people today, especially in North America, are taking longer to choose a vocation is supported by scientific data. Psychologist Jeffrey Jensen Arnett has defined “emerging adulthood”, which spans ages 18 to 29, as a distinct period of life. At a time when previous generations were getting married, finding work, and starting families, today’s young people often find themselves in a state of prolonged uncertainty. Nevertheless, they can find tools to help them move forward.
Building Community to Help Discern One’s Vocation
Arnett’s theory of emerging adulthood rings true for 24-year-old graduating UBC engineering and physics student Joseph Koh.
“On the topic of vocations, I can’t give you answers today,” said Koh. “I’m very much a case study of this kind of difficulty in making a final commitment.”
Ever since high school, Koh has thought about a vocation to the priesthood and married life. He has thought of his love of science and of the arts, and his fascination with philosophy.
Ever since high school, Koh has thought about a vocation to the priesthood and married life.
“It was stressful going into university, choosing just one discipline,” Koh said. He feels some of that same stress again as he collects his double major in physics and engineering, a minor in philosophy and a world of possibilities after spending two years interning in a nuclear fusion laboratory. He believes he’s not alone: “It’s not uncommon for my peers to be hesitant about making life commitments.”
Koh has theories about the origin of the problem. “Perhaps boundaries are no longer as clear, but I am also convinced that the digital age is having an impact on the maturation process,” he said.
The young man regularly attends St Mark’s, the campus parish of the University of British Columbia, where he often talks with Jesuit Father Rob Allore. “Jesuit spirituality has helped me in this reflection and introspection, to be more aware of my daily decisions, but also my long-term decisions,” Koh explains.
Father Allore, who joined the Jesuits at the age of 36, is well known as a scientist, studying how genes shape life. He is less well known as a pastor and mentor to many undergraduate students at UBC. But in this role, Father Allore has become aware of the challenges young people today face in believing that there is a purpose, a vocation, rooted in their identity.
“Jesuit spirituality has helped me in this reflection and introspection, to be more aware of my daily decisions, but also my long-term decisions,” Koh explains.
“The kids care,” explains Fr. Allore. “But they’re feeling like they’re thrown in the deep end and then they’re thrown an anvil.” According to him, the economics of student debt, a competitive culture fueled by unhealthy messages on social media, and the disappearance of communities that once supported young people and validated their choices have all had harmful consequences.
In this context, he believes that community comes well before the question of vocation. “My job on campus is to build community. Jesus will show up,” he says.
But another important question arises: “What graces has God given you that will lead you to a life of joy and fulfillment? He explains, “I think there’s an automatic reflex that as my sense of vocation grows, I have something to share with others. Then something happens, and the gift multiplies when you give it.”
Forming People to Go Forth and Set the World on Fire
The not-yet-34-year-old Charlotte-Anne Malishewski, acting chief commissioner of the Canadian Human Rights Commission, knows that she is not one of those people who get stuck between two ages during their transition to adulthood.
What set Malishewski confidently on a path to law school and the world of human rights was a Jesuit-inspired education at St. Bonaventure’s in St. John’s, Newfoundland.
The younger lawyer also does not believe that excessive idealism is the cause of the difficulties so many people of her generation face in finding their career path. Idealism is precisely why she and her colleagues can claim to have a vocation. “I am very fortunate to be working today in a place where many people are attracted to this work because of our mission. They want to contribute to the protection and promotion of human rights.”
What set Malishewski confidently on a path to law school and the world of human rights was a Jesuit-inspired education at St. Bonaventure’s in St. John’s, Newfoundland. “There was a real emphasis on this concept of being men and women for others,” she said. “That is the guiding principle, certainly, in my own life.”
Malishewski doesn’t mention any competitive programs focused on high performance at St. Bon’s. For her, it was all about connection. “There was a real sense of community within the school, but also responsibility to the broader world. For me, there’s a real overlap between the Jesuit teachings and this notion in Judaism of tikkun olam, of mending our broken world.” Her Jewish faith has been important to her success. “I have been very fortunate. My career has been guided by certain values,” she said.
While Malishewski’s success may be unusual, it’s not an accident, according to St. Bon’s head of Administration, Ignatian Identity and Student Formation, Annette Mallay. “We are forming young people to go forth and set the world on fire,” Mallay said.
She believes St. Bon’s graduates are on the path to finding their vocation when they leave for university, partly because they’ve witnessed vocation lived out daily. “Our teachers get paid less than those in the public schools, and they still stay here,” Mallay said. “So I know it’s a vocation for them.”
Certainly, St. Bon’s students read books, study for exams, write essays and absorb their share of information. But they also volunteer to help vulnerable seniors come to grips with their phones, tutor younger children or help at a community centre. “The encounters with those who have less than they do, the realization that society is not always kind to those who live on the margins, and they are getting educated in understanding their responsibilities,” Mallay said.
Even in uncertain times, our communities, whether parishes, chaplaincies, schools, or social justice centres, aren’t flawless, but they are steadfast in one thing: creating spaces where deep listening happens. In these places, young people find more than knowledge or care; they discover anchors (people and values) that help them navigate life with clarity, courage, and a sense of belonging to something greater…and maybe even take a leap of faith toward a deeper commitment.
